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Meletup

Nasiblah nak cakap aku emo ke, sensitif ke, murah air mata ke

Yang penting kau dah cabar tahap kesabaran aku

Tahniahlah!

Meaningless

Enough with words

You are not worth talking to

For you to know

Once I call you a friend and as long as you regard me as your friend

I will never ask you to be more beautiful

To be even better

To be the best

I just hope you can understand me well

Hoping you to know that I love you

Hoping you to know that I do care

Hoping you to know that I'm hurt every time you hurt

I'm sorry

I can't hold back my tears

Because you are significant to me

But I never regret to call you a friend

Senyum

He makes me cry

She makes me smile

*atas permintaan Elfira*

Uninvited

I have no where to go

I know no one ever appreciate me

Should I just go die?

Just nod your head because I know you wanted to

Hey you!

Love me for who I am,

Not for who you want me to be.

Piece

You are my superman,

Fly to me and set me free.

You are my zorro,

Pull out your sword and be my herro.

You are who you are,

And that makes me love you even more.

♥♥♥

I miss you guys

♥ I really do ♥

Being the youngest

Despite of having so many people talking about how fun it is to be the youngest in the family, here today, I would really love to make a twist, telling the real fact of being the youngest from my point of view, which is not so wonderful fairytale story.

My brother and my first sister are technically closer with each other because their age are closer. My sisters also have a close relationship because they went to the same high school and have the same friends circle. But me, I'm left alone by myself because I'm the youngest. Back then, I can't really join them because I'm a kid, should just stay home and watch cartoon. By the time, I have grown up, there's no one by my side. My brother is away. My sisters are having the time of their life. There's only mom and dad who stay next to me, but come on, I also need my siblings to show me some cool stuff that they have been through and just at least show me the path even if they don't want to lead me. So there it goes, I've grown up, creating my own dull path of life. Not to blame them, I know they have their own life to handle which are much more difficult. So my point here is, growing up as the youngest mean nothing if you have to spend it alone. Compare to the others, my life wasn't really shower with luxuries even though I'm the youngest. But the highlight here is I don't need a luxurious life, I just need the uncountless loves from my family.

That growing up phase of my life almost comes to an end. All this years, I have learnt so many things. Last year was a bumpy ride for my family which somehow has strengthen our bond. We grew stronger. I've always wanted a brother who can protect me, stand out for me and speak up on my behalf. I've always dream for that ~ really. It is so wonderful to know that the dream come to alive. Maybe my brother wasn't stood out for me, but at least he did for my sister. Look upon my sisters who help each other through the toughest time did makes my eyes tearing. Tears of happiness I shall say. I might not done a lot during this critical period, but what I try to do is pretending to be the most mature one despite of my immatureness. I pretend to stay strong and calm everyone around me who is breaking down in tears and disappointment. I hold on my tears, but no one knows that I cry in my deep sleep. The least I can do.

There are moments when I feel like I don't deserve this life. Being the ugliest in the family with the most dumb brain. I'm just the one who holds the unlucky charm. Suffocate everyone with my not-to-be-proud achievements. Sorry. For being the most terrible youngest on earth.

I don't need 10 reasons

There is only one reason to love you and hate you

I love you because of you

I hate you because of you

Butakan mata

It is so funny when we said no one love us eventhough there's actually a lot

It is even funnier when there's a truly one person who love us to death but we couldn't careless

At the end we keep bragging on how people don't care about us

We should start to realise that it's our fault

We hide behind a thick invincible wall

No matter how much others want to get near us, they still can't

Because we create the wall and never want to break it down

"I believe that I can break the wall, but I'm giving up. Not because of the wall, but because of you"

Titi Hayun

1. Berjaya panjat bukit untuk jungle trekking

( Terima kasih Elfira, Shaz dan yang lain-lain for pulling me up to the peak)

2. Berjaya habiskan night walk sejauh 2.5km tanpa menggunakan sumber pencahayaan pada jam 12.30 tengah malam

3. Berjaya berenang di sungai walaupun terpaksa guna bola sebagai pelambung

(Terima kasih kepada guru renang Izzati Rosli)

" There is always good bye after a hello, but a good memory will never leave"

Not this time

Kepada sesiapa yang serious rasa allergic gila dengan K-Pop, tolonglah jangan baca entry ni. Sila pergi tekan butang pangkah warna merah tu awal-awal. Ok? Tapi kalau degil nak baca jugak silalah. Tak marah pon :)

Picture credit to Yoon Du Jun's Twitter

Malam ni ada Digi K-Pop Live Party 2011. B2ST ada okay?! Mereka ada! Tapi yang penting I'm not going. Why? Sigh~ Panjang ceritanya. Tapi ada kawan-kawan yang pergi. Jadi harapnya dapatlah mereka membawa a piece of memory from tonight party. Serious rasa down gila. Tapi tapi, B2ST please do comes again, and I'll try to go the next time you guys are here. Pinky promise :)

Wave

CREDIT TO: Rachel Anne

Maybe its time to let you go, for real.

Wrong turn

I just wanna get over with this

I feel pathetic

My friendship being test and my law test is testing my guts

Too many test

Too many things to handle

Please for once let me be happy

DOOM!

I think I screwed up my first test which is for Law of Contract. I have a strong feeling that I blew off everything. I forgot the Section, or in fact I just can't memorise its since the beginning. I jumble up everything that I read. I messed up everything yesterday. I guess its my fault. Putting too much pressure on myself, being too nervous for no reason and can't handle my stress well. Maybe i'm just not as professional as I think to separate some personal issues with studies. So gonna give the biggest 'L' sign to myself. Yeah I'm a loser and I do give a damn about it.

Next week, Economy Quiz and Global Test gonna take place. I just hope everything goes better this time.

p/s: I think I need to stop listening to other's past experience with foundation of law cause it doesn't makes me feel any better but makes everything worsen.

First day of 2011

Resolution:

Get over all the bad things that happen in 2010, move on and be a better person in 2011

What happen in 2010:

Love at first sight, heartbroken, rejected, gain friends, lost friends, being stab to death and resurrect (literally). This year I realise that a friend is not always a friend. I learn that people are different and sometimes the different brings harm. I've also see the transformation of human where they change from a very nice person to the most evil homosapiens. But still, 2010 teach me to be tougher. Despite all the unpleasent events, there are still wonderful moments that being captured. Life is colourful and unexpected. One moment its sunny, a second after its raining, and sometimes after the rain we can see the beautiful rainbow. I believe bad things happen for reason. So when something bad happen, stay strong cause we will found something pleasent at the end.

Hope for 2011:

Brings joy and fun to people that I love and make them proud. Further my study for degree. Be a better daughter, sibling and friend. One more thing, I think I am ready to let him go. This time I won't open my heart easily~ For real. Gonna be an ice princess. Sorry :)